Monday, August 20, 2007

Do I Really Look That Stupid?

This book should be put into the Christmas sack of all men who use dating sites
I was looking forward to Friday night. I had a date with a man that shall remain nameless to save his dignity.

It all started off on one of those dating sites. You know the ones I mean, the ones where nearly all that the men are interested in is getting their leg over, Umm that doesn't exclude many as in my experience all the sites are like that!

Anyway, I received the message below from, I'll call him Mr. T :
12/08/2007 @ 12:48 the match wrote: Hi,wanna make contact so we can chat! T x

So I replied:
12/08/2007 @ 13:03 you wrote: Hi. I would chat but from the sound of your profile you are only here for fun and that is not the reason I am here. I do not do one night relationships and I like to really get to know someone before I jump into bed with them. If you still want to chat after reading this then email again. Thanks .

The next reply from him was:
12/08/2007 @ 14:07 the match wrote: Hi, thanks for your honesty-i can wait for the 2nd date!lol. Please let me have your msn details so we can chat easier.T x

After one more message I gave him my messenger addy, thinking he knows what I 'don't' want so must be ok with this.

How wrong I was. We chatted for a bit on messenger until my PC started playing up (again). During the conversation and even though I had made it very clear that I was not talking to him so he could get his leg over me he continued to bring sex into the conversation at every opportunity. Then came the subject of photos. I directed him to my flickr so he could have a look at the ones that are public. In return he offered to show me the only photo he had of himself, a naughty one, as he put it. I declined his offer, even though he said it was a 'good one'

The conversation carried on in the same style. His with a sexual tone to every answer he gave me. And then he mentioned the photo again:

(21:38) Mr.
T@bti:Are you sure you dont want to see my pic? may decide if you want to meet up with me or not?

(21:39)me:i think i made my feeling clear before we started talking. I have not changed my mind about anything but i think you think you will be able to change it

(21:39) Mr.
T@bti:Its only a picture!

(21:39) me:i am not here just for sex but the way you keep bringing the conversation back to sex makes me think you really are

(21:39) Mr.
T@bti: No

We talked for another 20 minutes in which sex was not mentioned once and we arranged to meet up and go for a drink.

Friday arrived and I met up with him and he drove us to a nice country pub, not far from where I live. We talked about family and holidays and past meetings. During this conversation the subject of porn came up, not in a sexual way but more in a general conversation way. He said about a site that he knows of but it was a pay site and I said that I knew of a site that was free and I told him the addy.

That was about the extent of the date. I was back in my local by 9.30 so I was either very boring to him or not giving off the right vibes. I didn't think I would hear from him again and to be honest I really didn't care if I did or didn't.

Anyway on Sunday he texted me. He asked how the weekend was going and asked if I had a webcam. That was when I knew where the conversation was going. When I said I didn't have one he suggested I could still see his even though I didn't have one.

I reminded him that not only would I be able to see it but so would anyone who happened to be in the same room as me. This was his reply:

'Then make sure you are on your own! Perhaps I'll put on a show for you'

I didn't bother answering, there was no point.

Monday I received another text from Mr. T asking if he had upset me and why I hadn't answered his last text. I explained I didn't want to see his 'show' and I gave him the addy of the porn site which he asked for.

The next text I received from him asked if I would sort out his PC for him and 'Maybe watch some porn?'

I said I would sort out his PC but declined his offer to watch the porn.

His next question was 'Do you watch it alot?'

I hadn't even said that I watched it and by now I was pissed off with trying to be nice to him, I'm a nice person and don't like to hurt anyone but I do have my limits and he had just reached them.

I texted back:

'I think you need to stop talking to me about sex. That is not my reason for talking to you or meeting you as I have already told you. I won't be answering any more questions about sex. To me sex is a private subject between people who have agreed that is what they want. We don't have an agreement like that.'

I sent the text and then went on to send another:

'If, after meeting me you've decided you would only meet me again for sex then it would be best for both of us to forget it'

He must have answered the first text before reading the second one because the next text I received from him was:

'I'm sorry if I have upset you. No mention again ok.'

And then in answer to the second one he replied:

'Ok as you wish. Good luck in your search'

Now I am left with a question.

Did he think I was so thick that I wouldn't realise that he thought he could persuade me to sleep with him or was he that thick to think he could?


Agnes Mildew said...

Urgh...I think I have either met this creep myself or his twin brother...or is it just that the men using online dating sites all tend towards the cybersex routine?

Within minutes of giving out my mobile number, after a date has been arranged, I have received pornographic images of these charmers. How to impress somebody, eh?

I've had livid girlfriends call me demanding to know if I have slept with their boyfriend (who has claimed singledom); I've had Mummy's boys calling mother to request a late night pass at 9.30pm and I've had 5'2" 'average builds', with muscular flab who have been old enough to be my Dad, yet claim to be is utterly hilarious.

In disgust, I have removed myself from all these sites now - but not before having written all of my dates up and now getting my own back in blogging about them!

I think the best way to meet a man is to get out - so I think I may enrol on a motor mechanic's course!

Good luck in your quest!

Ladybristol said...

Oh what a good idea - just off to the local college!

Istvanski said...

Why in God's name did you give your mobile number to him? Isn't that a bit risky?

Ladybristol said...

If I was a young girl who didn't know how to handle herself I would say yes it is risky but since I am a middle aged women with experience of handling difficult people everyday then no I don't think it was. After all, what could he do with my number? Ring me and get a mouth full of abuse? No I don't think he was man enough to risk it :)